The Sub’s Side: On Reactions

Reactions to situations can be interesting when you examine them. I have a particular reaction to threats in my relationship with my husband that in fact is not a bad one. Both of us benefit from it tremendously. We didn’t always realize that this is my natural reaction. It took many years of being together for us to see it for what it is.
The first time I had this reaction to a threat to our relationship was within the first six months of us dating. We had gone out to a club with who I considered to be my best friend at the time. I caught her making advances towards my now husband and he was not quick to turn them down. When we got home shortly after me seeing this I told her to sleep in my room while I took him to my sofa for us to sleep there. It wasn’t long before I had gotten on top of him and guided his cock in to my ass. I rode him as hard as I could. It was something we’d both remember for years to come. We didn’t think much of me doing this at the time as anal sex has always been one of my kinks. It’s the main reason why he and I got together in the first place as it’s a major kink of his too.
I may have had similar reactions in the next few years but no particular time that would make either of us realize that this is in fact my natural reaction. Again, it was hard to tell this when anal sex is such a big kink for us. We would get married and have kids. I felt at ease in our relationship and never thought that there could be any potential threats. This may have been me just being in denial or being naive.
Just over a decade later there would be an incident in our relationship. We hit a very hard time in our marriage. We hadn’t had much in the way of a BDSM relationship for years and had put most, if not all our kinks on the back burner. This included anal sex. When I was confronted with this major threat to our relationship it would be the next day that I’d have my natural reaction and slide into bed with my husband only to guide his cock into my ass yet again. It would be this time that would make him realize that this is my reaction.
We’ve talked about this on a few occasions as it’s happened again a few times. I feel like sometimes he acts out by telling me about women looking at him or trying to contact him online in order to cause me to have this reaction. Not that it’s a bad reaction to have. We both get great pleasure from it when it’s brought out correctly. He believes that it’s when I feel that my ‘womanhood’ is being threatened that I have this reaction, and he could be right. We know and have talked about his reaction to when his ‘manhood’ is threatened and I fully admit that at times I will go out of my way to be bratty and try to initiate his reaction. He tends to be more dominant and he needs to show me just how much of a man he is. So far it’s been working to our benefit now that we recognize these reactions and use them for good as they are not harmful in any way.
Why is it that this is on my mind right now? It’s because my husband has a party to go to tomorrow night and I might not be able to go with him. My natural reaction is turning into a presumptive reaction, where I just want to go home from work today and have the most hard core anal sex we can possibly have. I know that if I get my way with this tonight, that tomorrow I will constantly be on his mind as has been the case every time we’ve engaged in amazing anal sex in the past. This is not to say that it’s the only reason why I want to be with my husband in this manner or that I don’t trust him. I have been craving a good session for a while now and I do know that we’re in such a good place in our relationship now that neither of us would interact inappropriately with another person. It’s just the little devil in me coming out.

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